Lindsay Lohan's Sobriety is Bad for Business

Over the last several years, the tabloid magazines and websites have built up a select few people as worth caring about.  Sure, they mention most anyone they can get a snapshot of, but they've only highlighted a few "chosen" people.  Those people's bad, odd and disturbing behavior has produced major hits and sales for these tabloid drug dealers.  Unfortunately, some of the "chosen" few have cleaned up their act.  One of those people is Lindsay Lohan.
The actress/singer spent time in both jail and rehab.  She's now back and seemingly better than ever.  I'm not going to claim she's fixed/cured/healthier/sane, but so far so good.  And that's bad for tabloid business.
No one wants to read a story about Lindsay driving her own car around town.  They want to read about her stealing some other person's car and chasing other people in a cocaine induced rage.  But she can't do that any more.  Lindsay has to stay on the straight and narrow.
The once in-demand actress' new sober image hasn't stopped the so-called entertainment journalists/bloggers from either a) making it seem as though Lindsay isn't clean or b) inferring that she won't be able to stay clean.  They claim to have spoken to friends and insiders (who, of course, are anonymous) that say Lindsay will go right back to her old ways or that old users and enablers will weasel their way back into her life (not THESE friends, mind you, but the other, bad ones who don't talk to the media).
See, these journalistic drug dealers NEED Lindsay to fuck up.  They built her up as one major screwball, and if she doesn't screw up they have nothing.  It could get so bad they may start paying paparazzi to throw cocaine at Lindsay (or sugar or any white powdery substance).
Somehow, through all this, Lindsay has managed to keep one thing intact: her looks.  Her sanity may come and go (God knows her freedom has), but other than the period where she lost a bunch of weight, she's kept her beautiful shape, beautiful face and beautiful head of hair (so long as its not blond).  But it may not last.
We can only image the rumors that will be spread, the lies that will be told, anything to cause Lindsay to go off the deep end.  These purveyors of smut and filth need it.  They live off it.  Lindsay's sobriety is bad for their business.  No one is going to read about a happy, well-to-do starlet.  Happy doesn't sell magazines or generate web hits.  Getting caught snorting cocaine, now that'll get people's attention.
For Lindsay's sake, I hope that never happens.
Her sobriety may be bad for their business, but it's sure good for her own well-being.